Saturday, February 17th, 2001
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7:15 pm - Mistakes
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Well, I wrote some stupid stuff a while ago about a [friend?], and I just want to take that back. He's the bestest greatest sweetest person ever, and I don't deserve to know him, but I do, and I'm grateful for that.
He's got great talent, that should never be confused for anything but greatness, and that he's very complex, and that's beautiful, and he has a great taste in music, and that he's one of the smartest people I know, and that he gave me a chance, even though I suck ass, and I didn't deserve that.
And I hope I rot in the deepest darkest pits of hell for what I said, and may may my body be a breeding ground for locus.
I hope he has the bestest life ever, and gets to go everywhere, and that him and morgan will be very happy together, and that he gets everything else that he wants and more.
And... And... I'm sorry :(.
I'm sorry if that sounds stalkerish... but I just wanted to let people know that.....
current mood: wrong
current music: (Duncan Shiek) Barely Breathing
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(3 comments | comment on this)
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Monday, February 5th, 2001
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6:44 pm - So Me
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Wednesday, January 24th, 2001
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4:13 pm - It Goes Without Saying
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Sorry to those who may have missed me, and even to those who could give a shit less. I've been moving, mu hahaha! And I have yet to get a job. However, on the bright side of things, this new school has a sweet cafetaria. They have a REVOLVING food tray *big grin*. Everyone knows food tastes better when it's revolving, dammit. hehe, half my schedule is made of electives, god bless america and their shitty systems. brother is approaching, dammit, bye everyone!
current mood: On Edge
current music: listening intensly for my brothers footsteps
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(1 comment | comment on this)
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Saturday, January 20th, 2001
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1:39 am - He told me to look at my hands...
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For part of it came from a star that exploded too long ago to imagine. This part of me was formed from a tongue of fire that screamed through the heavens until our sun was formed. And this piece of me- this tiny piece of me- was on the sun when it itself exploded and whirled into a great storm until our planets came about. And this part of me was then a whisper of the earth. When life began to form, perhaps this part of me was lost in a fern that was crushed and barried until it became coal. Millions of years this became diamonds, and this diamond must have been as beautiful as the star it came from! Or perhaps this piece of me got lost in a terrible beast, or a huge bird flying over the primevil swamps. He said this piece of me was so tiny that it could not be seen. And he told me this part of me was called an atom. When he wrote it I fell in love with the word! Atom! Atom! What a beautiful word!
See! I did memorize it! Now if only I could convince Ms. Lynch of that....
current mood: Dizzied Up
current music: ::Counting Crows:: [long] [december]
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(comment on this)
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Thursday, January 18th, 2001
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5:58 pm - I Won't Be Made Useless, By the Idle of Despair
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Today was a day like the day before tommorrow. Just like any other day.....
current mood: Flighty
current music: ::Jewel:: [Hands]
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(3 comments | comment on this)
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6:56 am - Abnormalities
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I'm looking in these other journals, and thinking, god damn, a stupid comment like the one below would have gotten so many remarks had I had friends who were stupid enough to make sense of it. I need to get one of those. Stupid people are neat.
current mood: Find Out
current music: ::Guster:: [I]~[Spy]
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(2 comments | comment on this)
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Wednesday, January 17th, 2001
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6:47 am - The Reign of Nature
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If any of you ever take pyschology, would you care to inform me as to why we are prone to angst and hurt?
current mood: In dispose[able]
current music: Radiohead- {[ Talkshow Host ]}
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(comment on this)
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Monday, January 15th, 2001
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8:45 pm - Treblent Tones
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I'd like to report I'm done with my report. Yes, it took me two hours, but my excessive assignment is over with. On to the next one.
Everything that you are,
Falls from the Sky Like a Star
How is everyone today? I'm anxious to find out a few things. Like who evil one is. I wonder if I can get him to let me in. I think he's great. I also want to know what's out there. Who are you people and why are you rummaging around my journal? I think it's beautiful to be me, that is, to be curious. You're all beautiful too. Let's dance. As long as it isn't line dancing.
current mood: Undecided
current music: Goo Goo Dolls- {[ Slide ]}
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(comment on this)
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Sunday, January 14th, 2001
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11:55 pm - Sleeping Isn't All
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Right now me and my friends are having an orderly discussion on how much time sleep takes up your life. Personally I prefer that world to this. But in actuality, does it matter? I guess I don't think of life as valuable or precious as some, but I fail to see any meaning in this day to day routine, consisting mainly of heart break, betrayl, and an occassional happy thought, that will later turn into betrayl. It's a vicious cycle, and I don't know if there's a real way to stop it. Stop caring? That's kind of bad. I can't really explain it, but I think emotion can be good. I think there are some good things that come from it. I don't know if its worth the bad. I'll have to figure that one out.
current mood:  pessimistic
current music: Lisa Loeb- {[I Do]}
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(comment on this)
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2:28 am - Even Hell Has Benefits!
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I've been listening to my old music alot lately... how strange.... I guess it's a side effect of living in the past. Hmm... I'm pretty worn out at the moment, which is even odder, I'm used to pulling all nighters. In a sense I kinda wanna stay up with the rest, but in another, I know I don't belong. Well... maybe just a little in theory. They treat me good when I don't belong. Oddness.
current mood: Twitty
current music: Matchbox 20- {[Girl Like That]}
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(comment on this)
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Saturday, January 13th, 2001
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3:09 am - Translucant Memories
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I feel so alive in the moment.... it's indescribable... for the first time in a while I feel like myself... I feel content... it's great :)
I think I've come to realize, happiness is a lie, but we have to pretend it exists so we can truly go on with our meager lives.... just a thought...
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(3 comments | comment on this)
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Friday, January 12th, 2001
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7:40 pm - One Eye Perkier Than the Other
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I feel like I could just go to bed for the night, with the knowledge today was just another day, and tommorrow will just the same. Of course, I'm not sure I care, because there will be a change, eventually, and that's all that matters...*Sigh* I have 2 four page reports to do, and one 2 page. Not to mention a few science articles... tommorrow is another day....
current mood: twisted
current music: Portishead- {[Roads]}
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(comment on this)
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6:57 am - School filled with Dreams
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Thursday, January 11th, 2001
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10:42 pm - Illusional Gifts
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Hmmm.... Feeling better... this song by aqua it great. "What we do is what you want to do." Hehe, I think dreaming is definitly a great alternitive to reality. I mean, some things you just aren't ever going be able to do, so you might as well live it up in your own little world, right? I wish people would realize this, then we could live in a magical society, and maybe sourcerers would come back... come on, wouldn't you just LOVE to live in the middle ages? I mean, ok, not nessisarily live...with the black plague and what not... but they had the best damn imaginations.... and the greeks! Their EXISTANCE was a fairy tale!
Free your mind foo!
current mood: Bright Eyed and Bushy Tailed
current music: Aqua- {[Cartoon Heros]}
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(comment on this)
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6:35 pm - The Task
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Hrmph, Jared is so depressing. There goes my happy go lucky mood.... and my security in disillusion. Anyhow, I got a new journal for the hell of it, but I don't know if I'll use it. It just has a neat user name, maybe I'll use it once I escape, that'd be nice.
current mood: dismourned
current music: Portishead- {[It's a Fire]}
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(comment on this)
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12:15 am - Virtuel Essence
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Hehe! It's amazing how much escaping hell can make one person so happy! Only 9 more days, and I'm outta here! Kiss it New Jersey! And I get to put my name into a little more action.... you see, I dougged thyself midnight lakes because late at night I would dream of going down to our nearby lake and just dancing in the moonlight. I tried it once, but my mom woke up and put a damper on my plans! Damn her! Anyhow, the true midnightlakes will be revealed. Love to all!
current mood:  giddy
current music: Nine Days- {[Story of a Girl]}
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(comment on this)
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Tuesday, January 9th, 2001
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6:38 pm - Misery Loves to Throw Things
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It's a murky evening tonight. I remember, late at night, lying in my bed, I would watch the stars out of my window. Of course I didn't know the constellations, and I couldn't tell one nebula from the other, but I loved it. It's too bad, the citys swallowed up my precious moonlight. Damn population growth. Damn ghetto white surburia. It scares me though, if they can take away my stars, what else can they manage to steal?
current mood:  amused
current music: SemiSonic- {[California]}
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(2 comments | comment on this)
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Monday, January 8th, 2001
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9:37 pm - Blame It On The Chemicals In My Body
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He isn't here. It must be true love.
current mood: Wrinkly
current music: Our Lady Peace- {[Are You Sad?]}
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(comment on this)
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Sunday, January 7th, 2001
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10:47 pm - 4 3 2 1 when at the barrel of a gun....
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Ever just feel like shouting "I DON'T CARE" in response to every comment thats thrown at you?
current mood: defaultive
current music: Guster- {[Barrel of a Gun]}
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(1 comment | comment on this)
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4:15 pm - If We Were Our Defenses
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I think love is overrated. Confidants are much better.
current mood: Inquizzitive
current music: Alanis Morrisette- {[Joining You]}
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(3 comments | comment on this)
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midnightlakes's journal